What's this? Here, on my pants?

Moments like this are gold in a marriage I tell ya, Gold!

Husband: "Honey?"


Me: "Yes dear


You all know this is how I speak to people, especially my husband.  I think I vowed to speak this way at some point in that party.  You know the one?  Where I wore that white dress.

Husband walks in with blank pants in hand, wiping one hand furiously over part of the pants.


Husband: "What's this white stuff all over these pants?  They're ruined."


Now don't go all dirty birds on me, besides a few curse words this rant is PG.  I watched him, wiping, wiping, nothing happening.  A small smile crept onto my face.  I relaxed a little into my spot on the couch.  I waited.


Husband: "What the hell, these are my favorite pants.  They're Armani, these are really expensive pants, I don't want to buy another pair for that money?"


Me: "I'm sorry they're ruined.  Are you sure they are?  I don't think you need a new pair, I am sure you have other pants you like."


Husband: "I really loved these pants.  Wonder what the hell happened?"


Me: "Any ideas?"


Husband: "No, I should probably take a look at the washer and dryer."


Me: "Yes, you should.  While you are in there can you get out the vacuum and vacuum out the rest of the Kleenex you left in the pocket of those pants out of the dryer please?  Maybe re-wash all the blacks and see if that white sh*t comes of them to!"


Husband: "F*ck I hate when this sh*t happens."


Me: "What sh*t?"


Husband: "The sh*t you warn me about like emptying my pockets before throwing my clothes in the hamper sh*t".


Me: "Me too honey, me too".