Jealousy and envy while disregarded by many as ineffective feelings based only in judgement, albeit true, are still feelings most of us feel. And if you feel them, that makes them legitimate. Valid even. Your feelings are allowed. No matter what they are.
You can either be inspired by those feelings or hate because of them. Feel inspired!!!! Do something with those feelings. Talk about them with each other. Words often release feelings. So let go of your resentment by sharing what you are appreciating in another woman, with that woman. Even if it's to tell someone that you envy something about them? "You are so beautiful". "You are so smart". "That smile". "You're so funny". "You're so kind". Tell a woman, appreciate her. You will probably let go of your envy, jealousy or resentment by appreciating them. In turn, you might appreciate yourself for being so generous in spirit.
We are not in competition. You do not have to be as skinny as her, as fit as her, as happy as her, as successful as her....those are all your judgements of her and in return of yourself. Why not be your best self without comparison? Do you know how many of us would be happier? Would struggle less? You will always come up short in comparison, always. You cannot be someone else, as much as you may want to.
I know for me when the darkness of mental illness takes a hold, as it often does, I have to stop comparing and start self loving, as fast as possible to avoid spiralling.
Every single day we look at other women and say, "I wish I...." Either do for yourself, or accept yourself. Those are your only choices. Change or accept and love. We are all individuals. If I wanted her abs, (you know you've said, "Oh my god I want her stomach"), I would have to surgically implant them. My abs, whether hidden under a belly or not, are MY abs. They will never be the same as hers. They will always be mine and that means they will look different, they will act different, they will be different.
I might want to be a Victoria's Secret model. I might envy them, feel jealous even. My feelings, your feelings, our feelings, are always valid. I can either tell them how I feel and let go of my comparative resentment or I can figure out how to starve myself and exercise for 8 hours a day. It probably means some serious surgery too, you know to remove my injured spine. The more you think it through the less realistic it is to become someone else entirely. Oh and for the record, I don't personally know any Victoria's Secret models so by "telling them" I meant express your feelings, even if to yourself. Just be honest with yourself about what you are feeling.
You can either be inspired by those feelings or hate because of them. Feel inspired!!!! Do something with those feelings. Talk about them with each other. Words often release feelings. So let go of your resentment by sharing what you are appreciating in another woman, with that woman. Even if it's to tell someone that you envy something about them? "You are so beautiful". "You are so smart". "That smile". "You're so funny". "You're so kind". Tell a woman, appreciate her. You will probably let go of your envy, jealousy or resentment by appreciating them. In turn, you might appreciate yourself for being so generous in spirit.
We are not in competition. You do not have to be as skinny as her, as fit as her, as happy as her, as successful as her....those are all your judgements of her and in return of yourself. Why not be your best self without comparison? Do you know how many of us would be happier? Would struggle less? You will always come up short in comparison, always. You cannot be someone else, as much as you may want to.
I know for me when the darkness of mental illness takes a hold, as it often does, I have to stop comparing and start self loving, as fast as possible to avoid spiralling.
Every single day we look at other women and say, "I wish I...." Either do for yourself, or accept yourself. Those are your only choices. Change or accept and love. We are all individuals. If I wanted her abs, (you know you've said, "Oh my god I want her stomach"), I would have to surgically implant them. My abs, whether hidden under a belly or not, are MY abs. They will never be the same as hers. They will always be mine and that means they will look different, they will act different, they will be different.
I might want to be a Victoria's Secret model. I might envy them, feel jealous even. My feelings, your feelings, our feelings, are always valid. I can either tell them how I feel and let go of my comparative resentment or I can figure out how to starve myself and exercise for 8 hours a day. It probably means some serious surgery too, you know to remove my injured spine. The more you think it through the less realistic it is to become someone else entirely. Oh and for the record, I don't personally know any Victoria's Secret models so by "telling them" I meant express your feelings, even if to yourself. Just be honest with yourself about what you are feeling.
Be you. Embrace you, embrace other women. We are all individuals. And perfect as we are. Without compare.
*Nothing compares to you.....* (sing with me) I can't harmonize worth a damn but I will try for harmony's sake with all women.
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